A common penance can help strengthen a family during Lent

Friday, Mar. 04, 2011
A common penance can help strengthen a family during Lent + Enlarge
The Angelotti family prays before eating a meatless meal at their home in Centreville, Va.

By Father Martin Diaz

Special to the Intermountain Catholic

Fred played professional soccer for a while until an injury stopped him. I knew him as a community college student. I was a campus minister at the time. Fred turned out to be quite the leader. Once about this time of year, just before Lent, I ran across Fred at the gym to which I belonged. As we talked our conversation moved to Lent as I reminded him of the Ash Wednesday schedule – certainly a reminder he didn't need. He told me that for Lent his family gave up television.

In those days, long gone, television was beyond the four channels of my youth but nowhere near the glut of today. The more we talked, the more I became impressed with his parents' decision and the children's affirmation of their family Lenten practice. Each year they looked forward to Lent. During Lent they focused on their family life while letting the television rest.

The pastor with whom I worked at the time, hearing about the family Lenten practice, decided to invite the congregation to a common penitential practice. Being the university crowd that it was, he challenged the congregation to give up red wine. Those who preferred white wine were allowed to give up white wine. There was no talk of giving up beer as a congregation although, if I remember correctly, some of the college students took up the challenge and gave up beer.

What is the value in a common penance or a family practice during Lent? When talking with young people, we often hear them make the distinction between being spiritual and being religious. What they mean by that is that they are spiritual – thus connecting with God individually – while not needing a community to guide them. Among non-Catholics we hear people speak about their personal relationship to Jesus Christ. They mean they do not need a Church to bring them to Christ.

Jesus told his disciples, "You are the salt of the earth … You are the light of the world." (Matthew 5). The word "you" in each phrase is plural so it is "you all" are salt and light. Let me suggest that Jesus is the light of the world and also the salt of the earth. Rather than see yourself as salt or light, see that Jesus was speaking of the community as salt and light — The community is the salt of the earth … the community is the light of the world. Certainly the community is made of individuals. It is the individuals all rowing in the same direction that makes the boat move forward.

A common penance or family practice during Lent is not just theologically sound but also practical. How many times have you started a Lenten practice only to find yourself having slipped or, worse, having forgotten your resolve? When there is a common practice there is the built-in reminder – go to turn on the television set, only to have your child remind you not to. Go to pour a glass of wine as your husband or wife shakes their head in a no-no fashion.

When all in the family or all in the group have celebrated a common Lent the question arises as to when Lent officially comes to an end. The best answer is after Mass on Easter. If it has been a rigorous Lent, more of the family will want to attend the Easter Vigil Mass! Finally, Lent begins at midnight of Tuesday going into Ash Wednesday: not a minute sooner or later.

Fr. Diaz is pastor of Saint Therese of the Child Jesus Parish in Midvale.

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