Diocese celebrates National Marriage Week
SALT LAKE CITY — Couples from throughout the Diocese of Salt Lake City worshiped together, then had dinner, enjoyed fellowship with other couples and heard a marriage enrichment presentation during this year’s Diocesan Mass and Celebration in honor of National Marriage Week.
The Mass was celebrated Feb. 11 at St. Vincent de Paul Catholic Church. Msgr. M. Francis Mannion presided. During the Mass, the couples attending renewed their marriage vows while holding hands.
At the dinner that followed the Mass, the couples were recognized for the number of years they had been married. The longest-married couple was Vincent and Clorinda Militello of Blessed Sacrament Parish in Sandy, who have been married for 65 years.
The Militellos’ attribute their long marriage to several factors.
“We were just a good match to begin with,” Clorinda Militello said.
“Our Church had a big effect on us,” Vincent Militello added.
Both named respect for each other as a priority.
Following the dinner, the couples heard a livestreamed presentation by Jim and Maureen Otremba, authors of “Fully Engaged,” a Catholic pre-marital formation program. The Otrembas, who gave a three-day marriage enrichment program in the diocese in 2012, also are hosts of an online marriage enrichment video series that is available for free for couples in the diocese. As is appropriate for this time of the National Eucharistic Revival, the video series encourages married couples to use the Eucharist as a lens through which to examine their relationships with each other and Jesus Christ.
“The Banquet of Love, The Eucharist as Weekly Marriage Enrichment” is a series of 12 self-paced online videos, each about 15 minutes long; they are available on the diocesan website, https://www.dioslc.org/offices/marriage-and-family/banquet-of-love.
During the Feb. 11 event, the Otrembas focused their comments on how the Gathering Rites of the Mass can be used to deepen intimacy in a marriage. Jim Otremba said they have identified eight foundational intimacies in the Eucharist, which when applied to marriages “can heal what needs to be healed and resurrect what needs to be resurrected by the power of the Holy Spirit from the Eucharist.”
The Otrembas use the word “intimacy” to mean “innermost sharing,” not sexual intimacy, he said.
The eight intimacies they discussed are spiritual, communication, emotional, intellectual, temporal, family, physical and absence; these are the basis of the Banquet of Love curriculum, he said. “When we learn as married couples to understand the power of these intimacies and apply them to our marriage, our marriages can heal and resurrect. Note that sexual intimacy is not on here, and what we have found out and discovered is that the more we work on our foundational intimacies, the better our sexual intimacy can naturally flow from those foundational intimacies.”
Focusing on the Gathering Rite of the Mass, Maureen Otremba pointed out there is both predictability and possibility in the liturgy. Predictable aspects are the order of the Mass, when congregants sit and stand, when to go up for Communion. On the other hand, there are variations: perhaps a different presider, or even the difference between the Masses offered at different times of the day.
In the interplay between predictability and possibility in a marriage, she said, “we often see the Holy Spirit working, encouraging new growth and opening up new perspectives and ways of seeing things.”
Both predictability and possibility have positive and negative aspects, she said. For example, in a marriage a routine can ensure that there is always milk in the refrigerator, but on the other hand predictability “can limit the person to what we know of them, or what we think we know of them,” which can limit growth in the relationship, she said.
The positive side of possibility is the chance for growth, but too much new input can be exhausting, she said, adding that a balance between predictability and possibility is needed.
The Otrembas also talked about the Sign of the Cross, which can be related to the relationship between the couple; and the role of music, which can either soothe the heart or rattle a person.
Among the couples at the celebration were Dennis and Angela Robles, who have attended a couple of past events; they also are taking the online course.
“We always get new things [out of the celebration] every year, and it’s just one of those things that we just enjoy coming to as a couple,” Dennis Robles said.
Angela Robles said she also appreciates being able to renew their marriage vows.
The couple, parishioners of St. Francis of Assisi in Orem, have been married for 30 years. Communication and understanding each other are key to a good relationship, Dennis Robles said.
“And faith in God to help you get through the bad times, and the good times – he’s always present in your marriage,” Angela Robles said.
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