How Goes My Soul?

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Today I am considering my soul, that element of pure spirit that animates this robe of flesh that carries me through the world.

The Bible tells me I am made in God’s image, but it is my soul, not my body, that most clearly reflects that image. How could this not be so, when humankind comes in all colors and shapes and sizes and talents and abilities? My soul is unique, immortal, like the Almighty. However, although it shares these godlike traits and was given by God, my soul is not a speck of the heavenly Father implanted within me, for the Creator is first of all simple, in that he has no parts that can be broken off; and second of all, the Almighty is unchanging, while each time I worthily receive the sacraments of the Church my soul takes one step closer to salvation, while sin takes me one step away.

It is my soul that is capable of achieving salvation, not my body. Created of spirit, not of the dust to which my body will return, my soul cannot be killed. Christ tells us to disregard those who can kill only the body but to fear him who can destroy both soul and body. Yet why should I fear God, who is the only one capable of putting my soul to death? He holds this power but will not wield it, for with the overwhelming love of the Father of all he desires his entire creation to live with him in heaven forever; his love is so perfect that he even declined to destroy the Deceiver who defied him and now is prince of this world, afflicting countless of God’s people.

It is not God’s power I should fear but rather the fate that will befall me when my body is no longer able to sustain itself. At that time my soul will be judged, then sent to heaven or Purgatory or hell.

While it is God’s will that heaven awaits us, the path that leads there is narrow. It steers around the pleasures of the world that attract us, turning our eyes and feet away from God. As I contemplate my soul, I recall that even the most trivial turning away wounds me. I know I cannot commit suicide of the soul, but if I sin and sin again without compunction, will my soul wither to nothing, refuse God’s grace and be condemned to hell? But if every sin mars the soul, does each act of charity repair the soul? And if a good deed can make the soul grow, then in heaven will those souls that did the greatest good be larger than others?

No soul is like another; each person has unique gifts. If I develop my gifts less perfectly than a saint but am still judged worthy of heaven, will I be less happy there? This cannot be, for only perfection exists in heaven, and by definition perfection cannot be improved upon, so every soul in heaven must be equally happy.

Perhaps an answer can be found in the writings of St. Thomas Aquinas, who codified into Church teaching the ancient tradition that there are three types of soul: the vegetative, with the power to gain nourishment, grow and reproduce; the sensitive soul that gives the powers of sensation, perception and movement; and the rational, which allows for reasoning and thinking. Plants have vegetative souls, animals have both vegetative and sensitive souls, and humans have these two as well as a rational soul. In a similar way, is there a gradation of the size of souls, each of which will attain perfect happiness in heaven? What a petunia would consider paradise would be less than ideal for a saint, but will the saint’s soul, which will be granted the beatific vision, also contain the chewing-cud happiness of a cow-sized soul, the trail-of-crumbs happiness of an ant-sized soul, the sunbeam happiness of a petunia-sized soul, all of which are perfect and perfectly suited to the soul they inhabit?

The Catholic Church teaches that in heaven we will see God face to face, but we each were created as a unique individual, with our own gifts and perceptions. Will that continue in heaven? For example, when looking at a Rembrandt I see a pretty painting, but those more knowledgable appreciate the artist’s masterful use of light. Similarly, in seeing God, will the saints have a deeper perception of the Almighty than I whose soul is less large?

My soul, should it be ant-sized in heaven, would know perfect happiness and be content with its view of God’s face. However, here on Earth, knowing that there is the possibility of a greater happiness than my human mind can conceive, perhaps I should strive to avoid sin and commit myself to acts of charity in the hopes of growing my soul so that, with God’s grace, it will enjoy a more profound appreciation of the beatific vision.

Marie Mischel is editor of the Intermountain Catholic. She can be reached at marie@icatholic.org.