Personal narrative of abortion opens eyes

Friday, Oct. 23, 2015

RIVERTON — Introduced to sex at a very young age, having three abortions in a two-year span, working at an abortion facility, struggling with drugs and homelessness and remorse – this was the only life that a California Catholic woman knew, until she felt God’s mercy.

On Oct. 17, Patricia Sandoval shared her story with both the English- and Spanish-speaking communities at St. Andrew Parish in Riverton. Sandoval presented a narrative of the abortion reality and how this touches the life of women, families and society.

Growing up in a nice house in California, “My father gave us everything that we needed,” she said. “My mom and dad always told me I was their princess, and I believed it,” but her life wasn’t perfect: her father was never affectionate toward her and her mother said she intended to kill herself when she turned 40 because she didn’t want to look older.

The message Sandoval learned was that to be valuable she had to be pretty, have money, and meet a man who would provide for her. The first and last contact she had with God, Sandoval said, was when she received her First Communion.

When she was 12, her school presented a sex education class that graphically described sexual acts; the message seemed to be that sexual intercourse was permissible if the youngsters used protection.

Sandoval had sex with her first boyfriend, and although they used protection, she became pregnant. Her boyfriend supported her decision to keep the child, but her other friends told her that the baby would be an obstacle in her future. 

Then she realized how disappointed her father would be if she had the baby, so she had an abortion; in California, girls as young as 13 can have an abortion without their parents’ consent or knowledge.

When she went to the clinic, she was greeted as  some type of hero, she said. “They told me, ‘Don’t worry, it’s just a bag of cells. You’ll be fine.  … I was thinking how I was not going to gain any weight, how I was going to be able to do whatever I wanted with no responsibilities, how awesome I was because I was not crying, how my dad was never going to find out his princess was pregnant.”

After her first abortion, Sandoval said that she felt an emptiness in her body. She had two more abortions during the next two years, and she also took a job at an abortion clinic.

To her surprise, she was told that she could never use the words “baby,” “mom” or “dad;” rather, she was to refer to the fetus as  a sack of cells, and she was to encourage the girls to proceed with the abortion no matter what.

“The way I convinced myself was thinking ... we women have the right to do whatever we want with our bodies,” she said. 

Warning her audience that her presentation would be graphic, she described in detail assisting with abortions.

After many months, Sandoval started feeling deeply remorseful, but she was making good money, so she stayed at the clinic. The turning point was when she had to assist with the abortion procedure for a 15-year-old girl who was 6 months along with twins. Sandoval said that she just ran away. 

To cope with her remorse, Sandoval turned to drugs, first cocaine and then crack. She hit rock bottom after her boyfriend abandoned her. Alone, with no money, crying, Sandoval felt and heard God, she said. 

“When I opened my eyes I saw the most beautiful blue eyes. … It was a waitress of a nearby restaurant that was telling me to let her help me, that she was at work when she felt God telling her to look outside the window … and she saw me,” said Sandoval.

The waitress took Sandoval to her father’s house. When he opened the door and saw a broken-down, thin woman with no hair, he just held her in his arms and for the first time said to her “I love you,” Sandoval said.

Sandoval started the road to recovery deciding to become a pro-life advocate, she said. “The best way I found to do it was sharing my story” because she knows firsthand  that girls can be easily manipulated, especially if they are scared. Girls need to be taught to respect themselves, and to learn that life starts at conception, “and that God is always there with us; he is always talking to us, but sometimes we are selfish, we are self-centered,” said Sandoval.  

“She is a witness of God’s love,”  said Father Marco Tulio, Saint Andrew pastor. “She is witness of the reality and cruelty of abortions. She shouldn’t be alive, but God chose her to share her life experiences and that’s why she is here with us.”

“Sometimes, when you hear firsthand from a person who has gone through all this and has witnessed all those things, you feel shaken. We need to stand up and do more for the unborn,” said Rocio Cervantes, who attended the event.