Playing well with others

Friday, Sep. 04, 2015

In many of our Catholic elementary schools, students earn Christian conduct grades in part by treating others as they would want to be treated. This is particularly emphasized where a child sees another as different or the students struggle to get along with one another.

While the official awards for such behavior are not always enough to encourage what we might view as Christian conduct, it is at least a regular reminder to students of acceptable behavior in line with our Catholic beliefs.  

Unfortunately, it seems that some adults may need a similar awards system to encourage more Christ-like behavior.

Two recent examples of the less-than-Christian conduct in our adult world leap to mind. One has received so much media attention, I don’t even want to mention his name. Suffice to say one of our potential 2016 presidential candidates has tapped into some very deep and disturbing layers of hatred in our country. 

The other example is a less publicized, but far more prevalent situation –  the seemingly growing tendency of some Catholics to insist on purity tests when deciding with whom they and other Catholics may associate. 

For example, at least one self-proclaimed Catholic website regularly attacks some of our most effective Catholic social services agencies for partnering with other groups the attackers find unacceptable.  Many of these groups are not Catholic, nor do the Catholic organizations support activities that would contradict our teaching. But if any one person associated with the group has ever deviated from Catholic thought, the Internet morals police immediately, publicly and insistently demand that the Catholic organization cease all contact. If the organization should fail to abide by the dictates of the group, it launches vitriolic campaigns against the organization – casting stones, if you will.

Imagine if Jesus took this same stance. Jesus who befriended tax collectors and prostitutes. Jesus who chose to engage in meaningful dialogues with women at a time when his actions were viewed as subversive at best. Jesus who touched lepers, talked of the destitute as kings, and dined with the despised.

Ideological purity tests are hardly a new trend,  but they certainly aren’t the Christian model. Consider Pope Francis’ first Sunday homily. The pope preached on the Gospel story of the woman caught in the act of adultery.  She was hauled before Jesus to see if he would condemn her. Jesus did not condemn, nor did he condone her behavior; He was merciful. Since that first homily, Pope Francis has continued to emphasize God’s mercy, not condemnation.

Some purists argue that if you do not vocally condemn something, then you’re condoning it.  But Pope Francis reminds us that there is, and must always be, space for mercy.  We will not convince others of our righteousness by condemning them. Jesus helped people experience God’s love, not wrath. By his constant forgiveness, Jesus made it possible for each of us to experience true transformation. We can do the same in much smaller ways, daily.

We do not condone the sins of others, but certainly none of us is in any position to condemn any other human being. If we insist on purity from anyone we work or associate with, we will accomplish very little, to say nothing of the sheer arrogance of assuming we are so pure that we may judge another’s worthiness.  

Working with, caring for, associating with others with whom we may disagree is an act of grace, not complicity in sin. Jesus embraced sinners, knowing that we are all sinners and we are all in need of someone who will reach out to us and share God’s love through their example.