Where is the father of the baby abandoned in garbage can?

Friday, Sep. 05, 2014

By Veola Burchett

Special to the Intermountain Catholic

On Aug. 21, another baby was abandoned by her mother; this time in a garbage can in Kearns. As of this writing, the mother has been charged with various crimes and the baby remains in the hospital. As I hear comments and read on-line posts, many either demonize the mother or show compassion for her desperate act. There are questions about how her parents couldn’t know she was pregnant. With all of this, however, there is one question I don’t hear: Where is the father?

Somewhere out there is a man who is jointly responsible for the welfare of this child. Why wasn’t he there that Tuesday morning, making sure mother and child were taken care of? Has he stepped forward to claim the child and take responsibility for his daughter’s care and upbringing? Why do we as a society allow men to procreate and not take on the responsibilities for their actions? What kind of man leaves a woman pregnant and alone?  

Our society has come to a point where all the responsibility for the care of a child is left to the woman.  If a man does “step up” and provides child support or takes an active role in his child’s life, we pat him on the back. But it’s not all the man’s fault. We as women have to take blame for the way in which we have relegated men to the background in family planning issues, abortion and child care. Meanwhile, media typically portray men as idiots, criminals, weak or immature; few male characters in the movies, songs, or television are good role models as fathers or husbands.  

I don’t know what’s going to happen to the young woman who abandoned her daughter this week. I believe she must have felt desperate, alone and frightened. It saddens me that she had absolutely no one to turn to; no one to whom she could say a few months ago –“Hey, I’m pregnant!” Any woman who has gone through childbirth should be able to imagine the pain and loneliness she must have felt while going through labor. I sincerely hope and pray she gets the help she needs.

One thing that I was pleased to see was that all local major news outlets did a good job of reporting Utah’s Safe Haven law. In 2001 I was privileged to be sitting in the Capitol gallery as the Legislature passed that law, which states simply that any woman can go to any 24-hour health care facility and leave her newborn baby there. No identification will be taken. No questions, except that the mother will be asked if she would like to have an exam to ensure she has no complications from the birth. The baby will be placed in foster care and be available for adoption.  

Please tell others about Safe Haven. Parishes and schools can help by posting the information on their bulletin boards and in women’s bathrooms. Jean Hill, the Diocese of Salt Lake City government liaison, and I are making it easy for parishes and schools to get this information. We will have a table at the diocesan Pastoral Congress on Sept. 27 at the Skaggs Catholic Center in Draper. Please ask a representative of your organization to stop by and pick up two of the flyers. Safe Haven is an excellent, pro-life program. All of us should be promoting it and familiarizing ourselves with it.